💌 Ask Juliette: "He Says He’s Not Ready for a Relationship—But Doesn’t Want to Lose Me. What Do I Do?"

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ASK JULIETTE ADVICE COLUMN

6/19/20252 min read

💌 Ask Juliette: "He Says He’s Not Ready for a Relationship—But Doesn’t Want to Lose Me. What Do I Do?"

Dear Juliette,
I’ve been dating a guy for about two months. We’ve had amazing chemistry, deep conversations, and even talked about future goals. But last week, he hit me with the classic:
“I’m not ready for a relationship right now… but I don’t want to lose you.”
He says he needs time to “figure himself out” but wants to keep talking, hanging out, and “seeing where it goes.”
I care about him, but I also want something real. Is this worth waiting for—or am I just Plan B in disguise?
— Half-Girlfriend in Houston

Dear Half-Girlfriend,
First of all, let me say this: if someone really doesn’t want to lose you, they don’t keep you on the hook. They commit.

What you’re dealing with is Relationship Limbo — and girl, I’ve seen more women get emotionally stranded here than in a Whole Foods parking lot during Mercury retrograde.

Let’s decode it:

đźš© What He Really Means

“I like your attention, your energy, your body, and your emotional support. But I’m not ready to offer you consistency, clarity, or commitment.”

Translation?
He wants the benefits of a relationship without the responsibility of one.

💡 Juliette’s Rule of Romance #14:

✨ “If he’s not ready to choose you, he’s already choosing not to.”

That doesn’t make him a villain. It just means he’s telling you exactly where he stands.

đź’¬ What to Say

You don’t need to fight, cry, or beg. Try something simple like:

“I like you, and I respect your honesty. But I’m looking for something intentional and reciprocal. If that ever feels like something you’re ready for, you know where to find me.”

You’re not punishing him. You’re protecting you.

🎯 Bottom Line

Love shouldn’t leave you confused.

If he’s not ready, wish him well—and make space for someone who is. Because darling, you are not a bookmark in someone else’s unfinished chapter.

You are the main character.
Act accordingly.

With grace & backbone,
Juliette

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